Wouldn’t it be cool if Jeff Bezos bought a soccer team and it was just like Amazon: a gross, predatory monopoly that routinely harms its workers?
Or what about The Washington Post, where Bezos took one of the most well-respected news outlets and turned it into MAGA garbage? Or maybe Blue Origin, where Bezos pumped in $2 billion of his own money, which was not nearly enough, and, uh, things exploded?
Well get ready, because Bezos seems ready to buy a roughly one-third stake in the Liverpool Football Club.
Yes, this is a celebrated club in England and one of the most successful of all time, but what could go wrong by selling it to a bunch of billionaires?
Bezos is partnering with Amit Bhatia, the son of some steel billionaire, and Eduardo Saverin, who co-founded Facebook and—after getting super rich—renounced his U.S. citizenship so he wouldn’t have to pay taxes on his massive wealth. Real great guys.
Spirit of Shankly, the Liverpool supporters’ union, is worried—and why shouldn’t they be? Bezos has no background in operating a soccer club or any other sports team, but like all billionaires, he’s convinced he can do it all.
Billionaires are gobbling up soccer teams left and right. Saudi Arabia used its sovereign wealth fund to eat Newcastle United five years ago, and Qatar Sports Investment bought Paris Saint-Germain in 2012.
And, of course, sucking up to billionaires is the priority for FIFA President Gianni Infantino, who was recently thwarted in his secret plans to sell off the World Cup to, among others, Joshua Kushner. Yes, that’s President Donald Trump’s son-in-law Jared’s brother.
Unsurprisingly, Infantino has sucked up the most to Trump. From the invention of a FIFA peace prize to make Trump feel like a big, special guy to the reversal of U.S. player Folarin Balogun’s red card, pleasing Trump is what matters most to Infantino.
He even made sure to check in with Trump about his plans to privatize FIFA—because why wouldn’t he? Like finds like. Corruption finds corruption.
Now Trump seems to be returning the favor, yelling at FIFA about replacing Infantino on his failing Truth Social platform.
“FIFA would be making a terrible mistake if, for any reason, they even considered replacing President Gianni Infantino,” Trump wrote. “He is fantastic, having just presided over the most successful World Cup, by four times, ever presented. If he is gone, it will never be as successful or profitable again!”
But the thing is, FIFA might be much more profitable without Infantino draining its coffers.
Trump seems not to understand that to normal, non-corrupt people, he’s toxic and gross. Backing Infantino just rubs the Trump stink all over him, sending a signal to the rest of the world that they should stay away.
Helluva job, Donny.
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